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This Reptile is Cute

It doesn’t matter if you are at work. You can be in the super-market. Even alone in your bathroom, brushing your teeth, a Reptilian lurks in the shadows. Who is this Reptilian? What does it want? And most importantly…where is it? To answer these important questions we are going to venture into some disturbing territory. The inner psyche, the back of the human neck, and even popular media culture are going to be the domain of this investigation and introspection. To begin, it doesn’t matter if you believe in Human Evolution or in Creation Theory or any other discussion on the existence of humanity and the Universe. One thing is very clear: All creatures of the Earth that have spinal cords share some interesting similarities with each other.

Some scientists have named the different regions of the human brain. And other have linked certain areas with other animals. There is much debate on how the brain works. But I’ve noticed from actual observation of my neck area that there are physical and emotional links to certain behaviors. It doesn’t matter if there is sexual release, intense work on a creative project, or else playing a serious game of Heroes of Newerth…the back of the neck seems to be the area that endures the most stress and tenseness. I’ve found some startling discoveries through introspection and meditation on the true reasons for this strain and tension.

Last night I wasn’t feeling that great. I was too tired to work on my music video or talk to friends. So I decided to watch a good guided meditation video and then go to sleep. When I entered into the meditation there was this internal chatter that I am used to. When I really get into some good meditation and start to relax I feel my subconscious and ego start to communicate with each other like they are annoyed roommates. A lot of guided meditation people say this is normal and that the meditator needs to simply relax and let them talk their guts out until you can truly focus. Well, when I did that I noticed that the things coming from my mind weren’t what I was used to. They were almost a mixture of emotions and simple clear thoughts. And my ego had to process the information and turn it into language that I could understand.

The feelings were mostly of concern, and exhaustion. And what I could decipher into language was a simple question, “Why are you running us down?” and, “I need your help to do what you want to do.”

I sat in my chair with my feet up on my bed. And I just listened to my own mind and body sit down with me and reveal themselves. You see, I’ve been doing a great deal of experimentation with energy cultivation and I’ve been targeting my outflows of energy and trying to harness as much as I can. I noticed some excellent results when I did my comedy routine last week. I felt extremely confident and I was able to memorize and deliver my 10 minute set without much trepidation. But when I actually listened to my mind, I felt like a business owner that was confronted by an overworked union.

And everything was coming from the back of the neck. As I got deeper into the meditation I realized that the “Reptilian” is located there. I thought it was really odd when I thought of Stargate SG-1 and the snake people. In that show one of the characters had to enter into meditation to have the snake creature in his body help his immune system and repair his wounds. I think that the idea of the Reptile for this entity located in the mind/neck is metaphorical for our early vertebrae ancestors. It doesn’t really matter if people were created 3thousand years ago, or if  we evolved over eons. One thing is clear, we are based on a very, very old design. The spinal cord connecting to eyes is nothing new.

After diving deeper into the meditation I realized that I forgot who I was for a moment. Was I the mind talking and listen to my body? Or was I the controller of the body having a conversation with the mind? After a while I stopped caring who I was and decided to listen closely to what the mixture of emotions and simple thoughts were telling me.

The stakes have been raised. By going to the gym, practicing energy cultivation, and trimming lattes from my everyday diet, I had changed my working energy levels. My body understood this and make appropriate changes to my physiology. What I didn’t understand was that backsliding from energy cultivation and having, “FUN days” by drinking lattes caused greater complications for my body and mind than before. Over the past few months I have been in the process of changing my body and mind from a semi-productive performance vehicle that got by on Arco gas. And change into a highly productive machine that required small amounts of jet fuel and a tremendous amount of water to function properly.

The interesting thing, was that my mind actually felt like it was respecting itself, by me even taking the time to listen to it.

I’m more vulnerable to sugar and excess milk than I was six months ago. But I’m physically stronger and I’m able to tackle larger projects. Also I’ve been able to meditate multiple times per week so this is a good thing. I’ve noticed that sometimes even when I try to meditate I’m not able to hit the same place that I would necessarily like. For example, last night when I was finished with the meditation and I pulled my hands apart, I actually felt a warm pleasurable sensation throughout my body. It was a very slight tingling as if my whole body was falling asleep but I was entirely conscious. I’ve experienced this once before recently but it was actually a month ago.

So when I was able to get this feeling I knew that I entered into some good relaxation. The key was to stay still even though the music and guided meditation video had been long over. And just sitting in the dark with my eyes closed, without falling asleep was the pattern. That’s when you really get to know yourself. When you have no distractions, no task, no impending fears, just you and you.

And low and behold, this morning I woke up and there was some dark phlegm that I coughed up in the sink. After the steam of the shower flowed through my lungs and I coughed all the junk up. I actually felt pretty good. I drank some tea and ate some oatmeal a little later. And I realized that I was no longer sick. My immune system was returning to its healthy state and I had purged myself of a tremendous amount of stress.

Did I mention that a few nights ago when I did have a sexual release, I had a dream of a snake biting me repeatedly? If that wasn’t Freudian I don’t know what is. I didn’t have to over analyze that dream to realize that at least part of me was upset about draining myself of my main spiritual/bio-chemical fluid for no real reason. I interpreted the serpent as a creature that was upset at me because I had been training it to create extra energy for me to use for my creative endeavors and schoolwork. But I instead just extracted the ojas for a very temporary instance of pleasure. But the fact that I am even thinking about it consciously is a good start.

The trick isn’t being too hard on yourself. This whole thing is a learning process and backsliding will happen. But if we can be mindful of it, then we can make changes to self-destructive or addictive behavior.

Honestly, I can’t stand being sick. I don’t think it is a necessary part of life. But the fact is there are a tremendous amount of pollutants and stress factors in modern city life. So the only way to combat this is by improving the overall immune system. Piecemeal isn’t going to cut it.

Today I saw a turtle on my neighbor’s lawn. It was on the grass eating a carrot piece. And I thought, “That turtle is cute.”

-Tyler

Paint the Illusion

I’ve been working on animating a music video for the past 3 days. It is taking a great deal of time and effort. But doing so I’ve noticed a few things. The first thing is that layers are important for making an animated scene. The more layers that exist and move without cluttering up the focal point of the scene the better. And when you have layers moving from left to right and another layer is moving from right to left, that is appealing to the eye. You can give the illusion of movement by simply having the background move, but the main character or focal point may be completely still. And then there is using layers in order to give the idea of depth of field. You can move behind layers to make the scene seem more real. Then of course there is the idea of using vanishing points and lines in order to give the notion of perspective.

In an animated piece sometimes having exaggerated perspective lines can give the viewer a comfortable feeling. Trying to make things less real can let the imagination of the observer relax and more completely engage with the animation.

But as I was sitting at Starbucks today, chilling outside, I looked around and the outside world seemed much more like an elaborate animation than something real. I know from Buddhist thought processes that attachment to the physical universe is not necessarily a bad or a good thing. And even thinking about things in terms of good or bad is a form of dualistic thinking which is a migraine all together.

Yet the core thought that went through my head was: With enough creative talent, processing power, and patience, this entire life could be an elaborate illusion. That being said, I’m not apathetic or depressed about that. It’s a nice illusion and I respect and appreciate it. Some days are harder than others but nonetheless I enjoy the whole process.

Then there is creation for the sake of creation. That’s an interesting subject because there is something to be said about creating something and then sharing it with others. But at the same time there is this feeling that one gets from creating something, “Good.” When you do that, it doesn’t really matter if it is shared. And when I say, “Good” it isn’t the idea of good vs bad. No. I mean when you create something and you touch it or in my recent experience look and listen to it and say, “Good.” And then after double checking things, we move on to the next section.

It is less about perfection and more about completion. This is funny because many definitions of perfection include the word complete. When I think of completion it is more of an emotional response to a reality. This is complete, because I say so.

Completion seems very subjective and is in the eye of the creator. Yet perfection has a subliminal consensus attached to it.

-Tyler

Ain't gotta tell ME twice

Juice is so good for you. Especially so, when you combine eating a good meal and then drinking vegetable or healthy fruit juices as a snack/treat later in the night. I love rewarding myself for going to the gym, by drinking a big container of carrot juice. The weird thing is that I have actually had improvements to my vision about two months into my carrot juice consumption. Wikipedia says that vitamin A is good for eyesight. I used to think that was a myth. But I’ve found from experience that it is true. Vitamin A is in carrots indirectly because carrots have beta-carotene. And beta-carotene can be converted into vitamin A by our bodies. I first noticed changes to my vision during nighttime freeway driving. I remember being surprised by how clear the road signs were at a distance. I closed my left eye, because my right eye is kind of blurry during distance viewing. And I could still see the sign very clearly.

That is super cool, because I was actually considering getting laser surgery in 10 years or so, because I expected for my eyesight to eventually disintegrate with age. But I would greatly prefer to drink a satisfying beverage over having laser beams slice up my eyeballs.

THANKS VEGGIES!

-Tyler

Car on Beach

The other day I was on my way to Trader Joes and there was a person riding his bicycle on the Crystal Heights road. I wasn’t sure if the person was going to cross the intersection or if he was going to turn right into the strip mall. So I slowed down my car and waited for the cyclist. But a woman behind me was driving super fast and even though I was braking, she kept coming at me. So I actually had to honk in order to basically “ASK” her not to rear-end me. And in the mirror I looked at her and she was making a “What the Heck” face. And I physically pointed at the person on his bike. How bad did she need to get to Havier’s anyway? I know William Sonoma is a hip place to be on a Friday afternoon, but let’s not maim the people on bikes in order to get there.